Friday, January 16

Living & My Desires

Today, I took Luis to the airport. (Hes has gone to California for a few days to visit with a friend.) I went back to his place and cleaned a little. I wanted to make sure his house would feel welcoming when he returned. I turned on the TV for some back ground sound and proceeded. As I cleaned I got caught up watching a program about people fighting terminal illness. As, I watched the show, I started to think about how I would live my life if I knew I was going to die.

My initial feeling was relief. The relief was a result of knowing I wouldn’t have to live up to any of my expectations. I could let go of all my dreams, ambitions and goals. I would be free!

The only regret I felt was from the lack of time I have spent with my family and loved ones. This is the biggest sacrifice I make every day because of my dreams.

I decided that if I knew I was dying things would drastically change. I would make my priorities spending time with my family and friends, reading and writing. I would focus on what I’ve neglected. And then thought about how I have so many things I think about, wonder about, would want to learned, and want to say… I would want get it all out of me!

After coming to my conclusion, the next question I asked myself was “ why aren’t you doing that now?

I decided the answer to that question is because I have a strong DESIRE to accomplish my dreams. Today, I am building a future -- I have a path -- I am becoming better and stronger -- I will impact other people’s lives....

The biggest realization of my thoughts was that I DO live life every day for the living. I live life to create, build, and develop. I make choices and sacrifices. I live life because I want to learn and achieve. I live life to be uncomfortable,to love, take risks, be afraid, and challenged. I live life to have more and be more than what I had and was yesterday. And that I truly am blessed and Happy

Love,
Natalia

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